Sunday, July 13, 2008


I said the same thing when I first heard the word 'Vaginismus'. When I called to ask for therapists or doctors that deal with this condition I would have to spell out the word and explain what it was. I experienced extreme frustrations, highs and lows during my process of overcoming vaginismus.

Vaginismus is a condition which affects a woman's ability to engage in any form of vaginal penetration, including insertion of tampons, the penetration involved in gynecological examination and sexual penetration. This is the result of a conditioned reflex of the PC (pubococcygeus) muscle. The reflex causes the muscles in the vagina to tense suddenly, which can make any kind of vaginal penetration either painful or impossible; in my case it was impossible. These spasms resulted in serious anxiety, panic attacks, and depression.

There are two types of vaginismus. Primary vaginismus is the inability to have intercourse for the first time. The spouse or partner will feel like he is hitting a wall. Primary vaginismus can include the inability to use a tampon, have a gynecological exam and / or have intercourse. Secondary vaginismus typically occurs later in life. A woman could have had the ability to have intercourse pain-free, but due to medical issues, child-birth or surgeries the woman ends up suffering from vaginismus. There are a lot of great sources to learn more about vaginismus and I would recommend doing so if you haven't already.

Please feel free to leave any questions or comments you have on this topic. I have helped a good friend overcome vaginismus following my success and am open to helping you out if I can.

Best of luck to you! Just remember that you CAN overcome this.


mindy said...

Am i the good friend? :)

when i thought i would never get had faith in me. you helped me. i hit some super low points. but i did it.

so whoever it can overcome it too.
it takes a lot of effort.

but its worth it & its worth the tears, the worry, the pain, the stress, the Joyous times when you get to the next step...every step is such a huge accomplishment.

it makes you that much more grateful for what your body can do.

Mom said...

You did a beautiful job on the layout for this! You're beautiful inside and out! Love,

Katie Peterson said...

Okay...this is the second time I am posting a comment, so if it shows up twice...sorry!!

Oh Amy...I never knew, I am so sorry we ever teased you guys about having I feel like such a dummy!! I think I experienced a little bit of this after Caleb was born, it was awful!! You are so strong & how great you are helping others out too!!!

pennylane3575 said...

Hey :)
i found your entry in the vaginismus awareness group on facebook. I went to the women's therapy center in June of 2007. they seriously changed my life. unless one has been through the suffering of vaginismus, they really can't understand how difficult and frustrating it is. I'm so glad that everything has worked out for you though :) just thought i'd comment on such a lovely post.


Jaci said...

I too suffer from this condition! For such a long time, I was told it as all in my head and I needed to just relax and use more lube... ect. Just recently, have I come to find out it IS a REAL conditon.
My ex husband was not very compasionate when it came to my pain. He told me it was like making love to a dead fish! He made me feel like less of a woman! I cried after being with him. I felt worhtless and alone.
Today, I'm dating a wonderful man who knows nothing about this. Still, the pain is there! Everytime he enters me, I have a VERY sharp pain. It feels like he's going to blow right out of my abdomen! I don't want to tell him... I'm afraid he's going to think it's him or worse yet, leave me. I've been with him a yr and should have told him up front, but I had hoped it would get better. How do I tell the man I love it hurts when we make love?

Ashley Madsen said...

I am so glad you posted this! This whole blog lets other women breathe and say, "ok it's not just me." I was looking on your blog and found this.

I haven't had this nearly as severe as you, but have been there. My doctor has recommended therapy so many times, I even went to a counselor and he told me it was all in my head and if I tried to have intercourse twice a day (which was what he said was normal) it would go away. HA! I got more depressed and frustrated after seeing the counselor. My husband has been very supportive and patient even though it's been hard on him.

Finally two months ago I got to a place where I am starting to enjoy intercourse. Little steps are HUGE! It's a relief to the both of us.

Anyway, thank you for sharing your story and making me feel a little more "normal" after reading everyone's comments instead feeling like it's not common.

Maypaki said...
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